Not surprisingly, love relationships bring us the most joy and excitement in our lives and, the most pain and sorrow. Whether the relationship is ending or has ended through separation, divorce or death, the roller coaster ride we find ourselves on is extremely painful, even debilitating.
Far too many of us depend on another to make us complete. We may expect others to fix us, or make us feel secure and happy. We may either lose ourselves in a relationship, or, never quite step in with both feet. Then, one day we wake up to a crisis, or more subtly, a vague and increasing sense that we are unhappy, frustrated, irritated or just numb – and, don’t know why. Or, we believe we know why, and the why is the name of our spouse or lover, our career, our children, or a number of other possibilities.
Through my work with a multitude of couples, I have found that they can frequently work through roadblocks. As we do, they find new joy, excitement and depth in their relationship and more patience and enrichment with their children.
In some cases, one or both realize that their marriage is on life support and there aren’t sufficient reserves to save it. In these cases, my work is to help the couple do the critical work of managing the ending of their marriage, and the beginning of their new lives, particularly when children are involved.